404 - Someone who is clueless. From the Web error message, “404 Not Found,” which means the
document requested couldn’t be located. “Don’t bother asking John. He’s 404.”
Adminisphere - The rarified organizational layers above the rank and file that makes decisions
that are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant.
Alpha Geek - The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group.
“I dunno, ask Rick. He’s our alpha geek.”
Assmosis - The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing
up to the boss rather than working hard.
Batmobiling - putting up emotional shields. Refers to the retracting armor that covers the
Batmobile as in “she started talking marriage and he started batmobiling”
Beepilepsy - The brief siezure people sometimes suffer when their beepers go off, especially in
vibrator mode. Characterized by physical spasms, goofy facial expressions, and stopping speech in mid-sentence.
Betamaxed - When a technology is overtaken in the market by inferior but better marketed
competition as in “Microsoft betamaxed Apple right out of the market”
Blamestorming - A group discussion of why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was
Blowing Your Buffer - Losing one’s train of thought. Occurs when the person you are speaking
with won’t let you get a word in edgewise or has just said something so astonishing that your train gets derailed.
“Damn, I just blew my buffer!” (Synonym: “Head Crash”)
Body Nazis - Hard-core exercise and weight-lifting fanatics who look down on anyone who doesn’t
work out obsessively.
Bookmark - To take note of a person for future reference. “After seeing his cool demo at
Siggraph, I bookmarked him.”
Brain Fart - A byproduct of a bloated mind producing information effortlessly; a burst of
useful information. “I know you’re busy on the Microsoft story, but can you give us a brain fart on the Mitnik
bust?” Variation of old hacker slang that had more negative connotations.
CGI Joe - A hard-core CGI script programmer with all the social skills and charisma of a
plastic action figure.
Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving
the top brass with clean hands.
Chip Jewelry - Old computers destined to be scrapped or turned into decoration. “I paid three
grand for that Mac and now it’s nothing but chip jewelry.”
Chips and Salsa - Chips = hardware, salsa = software. “First we gotta figure out if the
problem’s in your chips or your salsa.”